A lonely 70-year-old widow finally decided it was time to marry again, so she placed an ad in the local newspaper. It read:
“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me, and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The very next day, her doorbell rang. When she opened the door, she was shocked to see an elderly man in a wheelchair with gray hair, no arms, and no legs. Confused, she asked, “You’re not seriously here to apply, are you? You don’t even have legs!”

The man smiled warmly. “Exactly. So I can’t run around on you.” She frowned. “But you don’t have any arms either!” Again, he grinned. “Which means I can never beat you.”

The widow raised an eyebrow, now both curious and doubtful. “All right… but one more thing. Are you still good in bed?”
The old man leaned back proudly, a wide smile stretching across his face.
“My dear,” he said, “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”